What Is Solo Dating?
Let’s get this straight from the beginning:
Solo dating is not the same as being lonely, bored or killing time between errands.
It’s not wandering around Target with a latte (though let’s be honest… that can be spiritual).
Solo dating is something entirely different.
It’s deliberate.
It’s confident.
And it’s deeply, quietly powerful.
Solo dating is simply taking yourself out with intention.
That’s it. But like most simple things—good bread, good lipstick, good decisions—it carries a surprising amount of depth.
Why “Intention” Matters So Much
When you go out with intention, you’re not looking for something to happen to you.
You’re choosing to create the moment. You’re saying: “I want to experience something beautiful, interesting, delicious, or fun—
and I’m not waiting around for someone else’s schedule, mood, or availability to line up with mine.”
That is the heartbeat of solo dating. it’s not about being alone.
It’s about enjoying your own company on purpose.
What Solo Dating Looks Like in Real Life
Let me paint the picture, because this is where people get tangled up.
A solo date can be:
A dinner at that restaurant you’ve been eyeing
An afternoon at a museum with no one rushing you
A glass of your favorite wine at a bar
A movie you’ve been dying to see
A walk through a holiday market
A bookstore visit followed by a pastry
A jazz club where the music moves through you
A class you’ve always wanted to take (pottery, painting, mixology—go wild)
It can be luxurious.
It can be simple.
It can be 20 minutes or three hours.
The point is the intention—not the price tag.
But Wait—Do You Have to Be Single to Solo Date?
This is where a lot of women get stuck. Coupled women absolutely should do this too—maybe even more.
It keeps you connected to your identity outside your relationship.
It keeps you curious.
It keeps your world larger than your household.
Solo dating is not about finding someone.
It’s about finding your spark.
The Real Magic of Solo Dating
Here’s what happens when you take yourself out:
Your confidence expands.
You walk into spaces as a woman who doesn’t need permission to enjoy life.
You start noticing things you’d miss if you were with someone.
The art.
The people.
The smells.
The textures.
The music.
Your outing suddenly becomes more interesting.
You see yourself differently.
“Look at me. Out in the world. Curious. Independent. Alive.”
That’s what intention does—it reframes the narrative.
You become magnetic.
Not because you’re trying, but because confidence + self-possession = irresistible energy.
People talk about “glow ups” like they come from skincare.
Honey, they come from self-respect.
How to Start Solo Dating (Without Freaking Yourself Out)
If this feels intimidating, you are in excellent company.
Almost every woman I meet says, “I’d love to do that… I just don’t know where to start.”
Here’s your start:
Pick something you genuinely want to do
Choose a non-negotiable date and time ( put it on the calendar)
Get dressed in something that makes you feel good
Go
Stay at least 30–45 minutes
Put your phone down every so often (don’t hide behind it)
Let yourself settle in
Go home proud of yourself
There. Simple. And wildly effective.
The Heart of It All
Solo dating isn’t a consolation prize.
It’s not a step down.
It’s not sad, desperate, or weird.
It is a power move.
It is a woman saying:
“My life is not on pause until someone else is available.”
It’s reclaiming your time, your joy, your curiosity, your connection to yourself. And honestly?
Once you start solo dating, you’ll wonder why you waited so long. Because here’s the truth:
Your best company has always been closer than you think.
And she’s ready to go out.
Get my free ebook, THE CONFIDENT WOMAN’S GUIDE TO GOING OUT ALONE AFTER 50. Click here.